Reality Discipline

One of the hardest jobs I've found as a mother is knowing when and how to discipline. I've recently learnt that the root word for discipline comes from disciple which in a nut shell means to teach, train and mentor.  Reality discipline is a relatively new concept that teaches lessons to our child based on the consequences of their behaviour. The trick is to use every opportunity to teach them a life lesson that will benefit them as they grow up into the real world. Shielding them from failure or by not allowing them to loose a game does not help them.  

We may think that we are protecting their self-esteem, but that is not the case. Self-esteem is derived from knowing their value and worth as a contributing member of the family and not through their successes alone. We need to prepare our children for the cruel, hard realities of life in the real world and to teach them that there is a consequence for every actions, whether good or bad.  By doing this, we will be teaching them how to learn from their mistakes and make a better decision next time.  Not every bad behaviour needs to be punished, but it does need a consequence that fits the crime that will help them to correct their behaviour in the long term.  Disciplining with love as a foundation is crucial to winning your child's respect and maintaining a balanced and correct authority position.  Rules without the relationship just leads to rebellion. Your child needs to know that you love them enough to want to help them to grow up into a loving, caring and responsible adult!